Not.
It's been 2 months since my last post. During that time, I underwent that nasty chemo I posted about. I'm now 2 1/2 weeks PFC (post final chemo, or as I like to say, post fucking chemo), and I'm getting stronger every day.
I told you all that I'd let you know how this last round of chemo went. It was... Well, it wasn't something I'd ever want to repeat. Each treatment took place on a Monday and the shot I talked about on the following Tuesday. By that afternoon, I'd be in bed -- for a minimum of 4 days. You want to talk about fatigue? I've never been so tired in all my life. I was also nauseous the entire time, but never once did I get sick. Like I said, thank goodness for all the anti-nausea drugs I was given. They worked -- as best they could.
My husband and kids took wonderful care of me during those weeks. On the rare times when I'd get hungry, they'd run out and get me whatever it was I was craving -- which was, oddly enough, usually McDonald's. Weird, I know, but hey -- those little cheeseburgers hit the spot. The kids would check on me often during the day, refilling my water glass (gotta get those fluids in no matter how icky you feel) or they'd just sit with me to chat whenever I'd find myself awake.
Typically by Saturday, I'd feel a little better. Good enough to get out of bed and move to the couch, at least. I'd spend the next week slowly recovering, only to turn around and have another treatment the following Monday. I had four of these treatments in all, each 2 weeks apart. They were grueling, both physically and mentally, but you know what? I DID IT.
I said from the moment I was diagnosed that I'll do whatever I have to to beat this. I'm happy to say that I've completed the first hurdle -- I'm DONE with chemo!! Yes, I'll still be getting Herceptin every 3 weeks for the next 9 months to treat the HER2 tumor, but that's not considered a chemo drug. It's considered a "targeted therapy" -- a protein.
I AM DONE WITH CHEMO! Man, it's so great to say that :)
Now, on to the next step -- surgery. I'll be having a single mastectomy in a few weeks. They'll also do a SNB (sentinel node biopsy) beforehand to see if the cancer has traveled into my lymph nodes. We're hoping that by doing chemo first, this hasn't happened. Everyone keep your fingers crossed that's true.
Surgery is going to be hard on me -- again, not just physically, but mentally as well. I like my boobs. I've always liked my boobs. And now I have to lose one. Yes, I know they can do amazing things with reconstruction. And yes, I have a great plastic surgeon lined up to do the work. But there's nothing like the real thing. Nothing like the sensations only the real thing can give you. I'm going to miss that. So much.
In the meantime, I'm just taking each day as it comes. Recovery is a slow process, but like I said, I'm getting better every day. I even went to the store yesterday AND cooked dinner for my family! Crazy, I tell ya :) I'm working some on my writing, too. My creativity waned during the chemo process, and I'm sure it will after surgery as well. But for now, it feels good to get a few words down as I can.
Also, now that I'm done with chemo (I can't say that enough!), I'm waiting for my hair to start growing back. I'm not sure if you guys know this, but I'm not always the most patient person. Over the last couple of days I have felt a difference in my scalp, but I don't see anything up there yet. All I can says is: Go, hair follicles! GO! I keep rubbing my head, encouraging the little guys to sprout. Soon, hopefully. Soon.
That's my update for now. I'm off to see if I can get a little writing done :) Everyone take care and have a great weekend!
